Wednesday, April 10, 2024

Trust Issues?

    I have heard that Jesus can do great things for me, if I put my trust in him.  No, not by winning the lottery, getting a good paying job, girlfriend or wife, etc., but truly great things that will grant me peace, transform me in any number of positive ways...really, I'm not sure what trust in this matter entails. These rewards or gifts are desirable indeed, but how do I trust Jesus? 

    It's a question I've only recently dealt with, largely due to critical thinking, and a desire to be precise and clear. So when a pastor of a church says "Trust Jesus/God", I ask myself, what does that mean for me? How do I act this out? 

    Pastors also say you have to trust with your entire being that God has your back. Here's another idea that sounds good, but is vague nevertheless. What does "entire being" mean? Usually people mean "mind, body and soul" to refer to one's entire being, and that's vague as well. What does it mean to love God with your soul? What is a soul? How do I love God-or anything-with all my soul? 

        So, I have questions about all this and I'm not the only one. Perhaps this is true for most people, and if so, who or what do they turn to for direct, explicit answers? My guess is the Bible, clergymen, books on the subject, etc. Some people try to think this through on their own, as do I, since I have trust issues with clergymen, as they are all human and subject to corruption, moral decay, self-centeredness and greed. So is it trust in what a man says from the pulpit, or trust in God (the Bible)?

    Looking at this closely reveals that my problem with Christianity is not with it's doctrines and values, but with me, i.e., with trust. I do trust the Bible, because if it were an invented book made out of whole cloth, it wouldn't have survived for over 2,000 years now. I don't trust men, because I don't trust myself. I know that what I am capable of, and therefore what others are capable of. 

    Faith in others, as well as in God, is the key, apparently. That is what I set out to learn how to do, because otherwise, it is very difficult to live distrusting everyone.